When the glass is only half full
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According to the advert, "Lambrini girls just wanna have fun". Of course they do. They're drunk. That's what drunk people do. They have fun. They have so much fun, in fact, that the next morning, they quite often wake up swearing they never intended to have that much fun after all and will never touch a single drop of fun again. Until the next time.
Some time ago, I was walking through Coventry city centre late at night, when I was approached by a complete stranger, who proceeded to tell me that I was a 'stand up guy'. Presumably, by this, he meant I was something along the lines of 'standing up without help' kind of guy. Judging by his own state, this was not a concept that came easily to him. At least, I think that's what he said. His words somehow rolled into each other so much that, at one point, I thought he was going to achieve the impossible and swallow his own tongue. Coupled with the fact that he smelled like a very experienced beer mat, I wasn't about to lean in closer to see if that helped.
Thankfully, that was one of the more pleasant encounters. Unfortunately, alcohol doesn't always bring out the best in people. In fact, in my experience, it rarely does. These days, most urban city centres, late in the evening, will showcase males and females alike seemingly regressing into an earlier stage in human evolution while under the influence of whatever they've been drinking. It can make navigating these public spaces difficult or outright unpleasant.
Don't get me wrong; I'm not opposed to drinking (at least not in the same way as I'm opposed to drug abuse). I'm fine with those I'm with drinking should the setting suit it, and I don't mind being the only sober one at a party. I'm used to it. I wonder, however, if it isn't something that some people rely on a little too much (and to excess) to have fun. As if they've forgotten how to enjoy themselves without it. The number of stories I hear these days that begin with "this one time I got so drunk that…" or "I was out drinking the other night"... They're almost as delightful as the related 'vomit' stories a colleague of mine feels obliged to share.
A few weeks ago, my family were shocked by my eighteen-year-old cousin's confession that she doesn't drink. Most of my family are 'social drinkers'. A couple reserve the option to class the television as a friend for just such a reason. I've never been a drinker, more because I have very fussy tastes and haven't found an alcoholic beverage I liked, though increasingly I find myself further put off the concept of drinking entirely by the behaviour of those under the influence.
As things stand, I am quite able to content myself by remembering with a clear head all of the embarrassing things my friends, family members and colleagues achieved the night before. Nevertheless, I find great comfort in my ability to have just as much fun (and far less embarrassment) without any chemical stimulants whatsoever. Now, if I could just find one of those Lambrini girls...